humor

Some Rules Are Better Left Unread

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The bullet whistled right by my head, missing me by less than an inch.  

I had just one bullet left in my magazine, yet this piece I was holding could actually carry 12.    I decided I needed more.  I decided I needed to launch another barrage of gunfire to bring him down.  I reached slowly behind me to load  some bullets that had fallen out of my pocket, not knowing for sure if he could see me or not.  

I heard it coming, the second one.   Then I felt it explode into the back of my head.

Less than an hour after Church this last Sunday, I am dead.

It’s a headshot you see.  It’s how it works.  He wins.  Those are the rules. 

Well not really.  In fact, the rules written are quite the opposite of what we actually do when we break out the powerful Nerf gun blasters and conduct Living Room Warfare.

What, you say?  Doesn’t the box clearly state… don’t aim at other people’s faces with Nerf gun dart blasters?  Please.     No self respecting father with a 13 year old son would follow a rule like that.   What’s the fun in that?

Aside from the only rule I insist on which is that we both wear eye protection (only to avoid an afternoon in the ER), we believe Nerf guns were made for headshots.  We believe that Nerf guns were made for face shots and especially ear shots (which hurt nasty).  So skip the flimsy targets that come in the box and the goofy Velcro vests; you are going down with (hopefully) a foam bullet shot right to the middle of your forehead.

Here’s the real point.  And it’s a good one because I fancy myself most of the time to be a rule follower (in fact, my family frequently quotes me sarcastically “ ..Without rules, there’s chaos…”.) 

Sometimes, rules are better left unread.  

Sometimes rules not followed make it more fun, or more memorable or more special or more helpful or just…more better.  So be it lack of following all the rules for Living Room Warfare or for the Rules of Work, it does not matter;

Here are 3 other rules that are often better left unread.

Get to work on time.  Sure, it’s part of a manual, HR handout or your own sense of when to start your day, but you are in sales.  Unless you are staffing a phone with incoming calls you need to think that this is a rule to be abandoned.  You can’t get a hold of owners, CEO’s or entrepreneurs at “normal hours”.  Gotta mix it up and call later or earlier or even on Saturday.  And by the way, you will differentiate yourself from the competition in a very good way if you do it right.

Social Network on Your Own Time.  If one thinks a professional LinkedIn page, Twitter account or Facebook page is something not considered work relevant; one would be mistaken.  It is called Reputation Management and if you are a Sales person you need to have a Glowing Web Reputation to manage.  Take the time to build and be credible in the social internet spheres.  Your customers and prospects will be searching and be looking for you, who you hang out with and what you say.  “Professional” is the key here folks and in your sales space where trust is low, reputation must be high.

Employees Are Required To Take Vacation;   No you aren’t.   There’s nothing that says you can’t stop showing up at work 2 weeks a year yet be waist deep in learning new or better skills to do your job.   Wouldn’t be a waste to read 7 Jeffrey Gitomer books or every Seth Godin Book or a Jill Konrath Book or an Art Szobcek book; all of which would help you not in just work ……but in life.   If you ain’t learning, you are dying. 

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

A Salesperson’s Halloween Poem

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Beautiful Poetry can lift the soul, make one weep inconsolably, inspire through a lifetime and especially around the Holidays, bring great strength and joy to all who read it.

When I write poetry about my beloved salespeople….not so much.  

A Salesperson’s Halloween

Oh Hallowed Eve, oh night of ghoul,
Your day is full shrieks and shrills.
But I’m thinking what trick or treaters really need
Is some help with basic sales skills.

A 3 foot tall, pillowcase toting Dracula
Squeaking out “Trick or Treat” is pretty weak,
It’s actually a cold call gosh darnit!
Yet no effort to get the neighbor to speak?

Wee Goblins, Witches and Headless Horsemen
Offer some scares but no sales approach.
Don’t we all want more candy? More upgrades?
Let me at em’, Let me coach!

So with a wicked twist on Trick or Treating
I’ll lead this effort as a hands-on leader
As I on this night, and finally for a change,
Will be a Treetee and not a Treater.

We’ve seen it before, the real tall ones
With the beards and even a cigarette dangling
Those arms outstretched as child pretenders,
Doing hardcore candy angling.

But being a middle aged sales pro, I’ll be different,
Use real sales skills and dress like Freddy Krueger!
I’ll either get oodles more candy and teach these kids,
Or end up in a cruiser.

Till next time, 

Grow The Business. 

Mark

6 Questions Never To Ask A Customer

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Current customer or potential customer it makes no difference, here are 6 questions that need to be dead.

1. “How are you today?”  Nothing screams I’m a sales rep like “How are you today?”  Jeepers Criminy!   You just interrupted a customer with an unannounced visit or a phone call and you ask that?  Might as well have the words “Commissioned Sales Rep” read across their phone display or plastered on a bright red button affixed to your lapel.

2. “Are you the decision maker?”  What, are you stuck in “Boiler Room” reruns?  How much more offensive can you be?  Most people you need to ask that question to have some influence (if not being the wife, the husband or colleague of the one who is).  Talk about self serving and rude.   Try being polite and ask “Who besides yourself has a say in the decision process?”

3. “Are you happy with your current supplier?” All right!  You are looking to trash the current vendor!  Way to make a sale.  Or maybe you are hoping you are calling at the right time (exactly) when dissatisfaction is underway (good luck with that sales strategy).  So 80’s.  Presume always the customer is happy with the current provider and sell on your competitive differentiators.  If there is dissatisfaction, you’ll hear it then.

4. “Would you like 100 or 200?” The assumptive sale died in 1979.  It really did along with Disco and literally, John Wayne.   Don’t you realize that more than half the people you sell to today used to, or currently “sell” in their own jobs today?  You don’t think they recognize an assumptive close?  You don’t think it raises all kinds of tension and slams the door on you?  So sad.  Well at least now you know 31 years later and “I’m not going to have to hit you, kid”.

5. “Would you like to “save money”, “save time” or “save the planet?”  Lords of Light!  This is the most offensive of them all.  Never ask a question in which there is only one right answer or the person sounds like an idiot.  I am shocked how often I hear these types of questions, or worse see them in marketing material or training material.   Of course people care about saving money, time and the darn planet; quit trying to wrap your product around that offensive question.  

6. “May I ask what you are wearing?”  True Story.  His name was David.    It was 1991.  He was a young promising sales rep in the call center.  I was his coach.  We were working on “building rapport”.   I taught young David to ask intelligent questions during the order entry process as a means to build credibility and thusly improve his chances of a cross sell.  Solid stuff.  David was flustered.  I was sitting plugged in next to him listening.  I whispered “..Ask her a question!”  He looked at me wide eyed and clueless.  I whispered louder this time..  “Ask her a question!”  He did.    I wonder how David is doing today.

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

The Beginning Sticks

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The four brothers will be together again next week.  It’s been a while.

One’s flying in from New Zealand, another GreyHounding it from Manhattan and the third, well he’s local just like me.   And though we are all in our 40’s now, we’ll act like a bunch of 9 year olds (as we always do) when we get together at Mom’s house.

Because in the beginning, that’s what we did.  And the beginning really sticks.  Being all roughly two years apart, it was those middle school years, it was then that we truly bonded and for lack of a better word; brothered .

So sure our kids will be in tow and our wives and significant others will share in the fun next week but without doubt the youngest, most hyperactive and colossally immature crew will be the four of us.

We’ll settle into a hilariously silly game that will drive my 77 year old mother crazy (as she doth protest too much yelling “Knock it off!” whilst stifling chuckles).  Foam coasters will Frisbee around the living room chair to chair as we see how long we can play catch without dropping a coaster or worse, getting caught by Mom in the act of throwing them. 

And yes, we’ll try to hold the laughter in like giggling 4th graders every time it flies just out of her sight (or better yet, just behind her head as she walks back and forth from the kitchen).  Couch pillows will tumble, table lamps will teeter and spouses will hang their heads in embarrassment as we four being much older now, risk grave injury diving off that recliner to make the incredible catch to keep the game alive.

Because that’s how we were in the beginning, and getting together so many years later, it’s no use, we are going back- the beginning sticks.

**

You won’t think I’ll go from flying coasters to flying planes but I will.

Sullenberger landed that plane in the Hudson and he called upon all that training, all the experience and all stuff from the very beginning, from his “earliest days” he said, to land that plane the best he could.   He even called it “primacy”, those times in the beginning.  He did later what he knew from earlier, much earlier, because the beginning sticks.

Those flight attendants didn’t call out the emergency announcements they were most recently were trained on at US Air but rather,  they shouted out the ones they learned years and years ago when they first started out with another airline.  They did later what they knew from earlier, much earlier, because the beginning sticks. 

**

You won’t think I’ll go from coasters to cockpits to some counsel but I will. 

The beginning sticks.  It sticks no matter if it’s about something as ordinary as how 4 brothers bonded with their Mother in a living room, or if it’s about the extraordinary first days of training of a pilot and crew.   The beginning sticks and therefore it matters. 

The beginning sticks is a reminder of how important those first instructions are to help a child hold a bat or how to start that diary or how to deal with the loss of a pet.   The beginning sticks translates to business too and is a reminder of how important your new hire classes are, your on boarding programs are, your mentoring is or those first few initial team meetings or even those early team outings are.

It’s just a plain ol’ reminder about how sticky the beginning is of just about anything important.  

Don’t look past the beginning.  Prepare for it.  Do it right or do it fun.  Or do it both right and fun.  Because how ever you do it, it’ll stick.

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

3 Crazy Causation Theories

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There is that “correlation not causation” perspective that people talk about.   I ran across it most recently last week reading something, somewhere, about Diet Coke. 

Some article talked about a reputable study a couple of years ago suggesting that you, the Diet Coke drinker, were by some large and scary percentage,  more likely to become obese if you drank Diet Coke vs. someone who did not drink Diet Coke. 

Good Times.  I love Diet Coke. 

Thankfully the article reminded us that the study was flawed because what you really had a hard time discerning was if those people who were becoming or were already obese, had decided to start drinking Diet Coke while “obesing” vs. the other way around so to speak.  Hence though there may be a “correlation” between Diet Coke and obesity, there is not necessarily, “causation” from Diet Coke to obesity.

There is a lot of that crazy “causation” stuff out there in the sales world too. 

Crazy Causation Theory # 1:  Successful salespeople have the best accounts; they don’t make half the calls or presentations you do, but are still raking in the most dough.

Ah….yes…I had the worst sales territory in the world back in my day.  I was insanely jealous of my fellow sales reps that had the best accounts or territory. 

So yes dear colleague of today, you are right; the successful reps often don’t make nearly as many calls as you do and they do have the best accounts.  Truth is though; their phone rings more often and their inboxes fill up faster than yours does.  When they do call out, they are more effective than you.  More often than not, these successful reps artfully cultivate customers, drive referrals through them and in essence, have and continue to deliver greater experiences to their clients thereby creating a misperception to the rest of us about what exactly causes what. 

Hats off to you Jack Barry in 1994, you’re territory was the best, but now I know you weren’t lucky; rather, you made it so. 

Crazy Causation Theory #2; The more calls or offers you make, the more sales you’ll get.

Nope, not in this business.  That adage in sales that  “It’s all a numbers game” is a horrible lie.  Never believe it.  Many of you reading this are you are working with a finite list of existing customers or prospects, or of calls coming into you; which you usually cannot control.

Pounding out calls or making 5 offers/closes on every incoming/outgoing call to a finite universe doesn’t make the sales; quality contacts do.  In Outbound calling, it’s even more dangerous.  Pound out some self serving, rapid fire voicemails or live monologues to your assigned clients hoping to the sales gods above that you caught the customer exactly when they have a need and you’ll put yourself in a worse position 6 weeks later or 6 months later when you try and sell them something else.   Customers want help, not pitches and power dialing.

If you have the world as your territory and the yellow pages as your lead source; yes indeed, it is all a numbers game then.  For a while.  Make as many calls and offers as you want.  And have fun with that as you’ll last about 6 months before you can’t wait to quit.  No worries, your boss already a replacement ready to backfill you who has the same false belief.

Crazy Causation Theory #3:   The harder you work, the more successful you will be.  

That ain’t true in sales.  It may be true for cemetery workers (been there, worked hard despite my co-workers’ slacker cries to “slow down!”).  It may be true for grocery baggers (worked hard there too and loved the job) and forklift operators (worked hard and proudly with no incidents thank you), but it is not true in sales.  Working hard just is not enough. 

Working hard will only get you so far; here is what else you need:

  • Acting skills: ( Be a story teller & have the ability to make your 41st  performance today look and sound like your first)
  • Thirst for knowledge and self learning. (Pssst… the webpage functionality just changed 5 minutes ago and your product offer is now outdated.  Do you really want to wait for the memo or the training on that? )
  • Mental Positivity.  If you close 15 % of your leads /opportunities then you are a ROCK STAR though that means the other 85% reject you.  Working harder doesn’t help you here.
  • Sales Skills; Have no idea where you are in the sales process or what a good question is vs. a bad one?  Good luck working hard here while you are in the dark.
  • Help:  Few sales stars work in a vacuum. They are not afraid to ask for help, seek guidance and even demand coaching.

 

There.  Now go chill and have a Diet Coke.  No causation there to worry about.

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

Kill all Leads, Commissions and Sales Reps

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I’m done with these three.

You should be too.  It’s tough because I worked them, fed my family with them and have been one for a lot of my life.

But I don’t believe anymore in what we call these three.

We need to change the names of these things.   It would do us wonders on so many levels.   Bad names can hurt what people think about you.  Bad names can hurt what you think about yourself.

And I’m done with that.

**

Leads.  Ugh.  Please, this is word is the worst offender.  “Give me the leads”.  “The leads stink”.  “I need more leads”.  The word “leads” just reeks of a faceless commodity. 

Change the word to “Needs”.  Every lead is really a person or people with a need.  And every Need has a solution or a way it can be filled.  A Need is customer focused.  A Need is something to rally around.  A Lead on the other hand, is blah.  A Lead is for us.  And “us” should not be the focus.

Think of what would change and how we might feel or do differently if:

Leadflow becomes Needflow. Lead Management becomes Need Management. Lead Generation becomes Need Generation.  Isn’t that better?

Commission. An ugly heinous word in sales don’t you think?  A word so commonly hated that many companies go out of their way to advertise that their sales pros are not paid on something so ghastly as to be called “commission”. 

Let the Commission Plan become a Mission Plan that “rewards” behaviors and results.  “Commission” the word, disappears and “Rewards” becomes the lead story.  “Rewards Pay” details not what portion of a sale price goes to a rep but what portion is added to the reps pay as a reward for behavior or results. Semantics?  Yes, my point exactly.

“Rewards” the word doesn’t sound like a “take” or “cut” or an “added cost” to a client ( or to the sales rep).   Rewards are awarded by the boss or the company for a mission accomplished well.

Think of what would change and how we might feel or do differently if:

Commission payout becomes Rewards payout. Higher Commissions become Higher Rewards. I work on Commission becomes I work on Rewards.  Client Commissions become Client Rewards.  Isn’t that better?

Sales Rep:  Ah….. the almighty fearful title.  For at least 60 years people have tried variations to hide or mask or those two words.  Nobody it seems wants to be called a Sales Rep.  No doubt you’ve heard or have been an “Account Executive” or a “Territory Manager” or a “Sr. Business Development Mgr” and on and on….. all the while being um…..well, a Sales Rep.

Truth is, the name “Sales Rep” sucks.  It has always sucked.

It’s not customer focused, it’s company focused.  It’s not broad sounding, it’s narrow sounding.  It’s got one of the most stereotyped images around of greed, neglect and selfishness.

The new name is simple. 

Help Rep.

Help.  It’s what any true sales rep really does anyway.  Help fill a need.  Help fix a problem.  Help make something better. Help you feel happy or organized or in control.  Help you grow your business. Help you run your business.  

Think of what would change and how we might feel or do differently if:

You walk into a Macy’s store and you talk to a Macy’s Help Rep, or walk on a car lot and talk to at Toyota Help Rep, or call Deluxe Corp and get a Deluxe Help Rep.

Maybe all the Help Reps fly in for a big Help Conference in Chicago called the Big Help.   Maybe there Help Contests for the Help Reps.  Maybe you get better and better at Helping vs. better and better at Selling. 

**

Pretty simple stuff these changes are to make.  And if we just do it I swear we could change a little bit of the world.

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

An Heartfelt Letter From Your Headset

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Dear Sweetie,

It’s about to get real busy again, so I wanted to write you this letter now.  

You and I don’t talk as much as we used to (at least not to each other).  Maybe it’s because I get up into your hair sometimes and am literally in your face all day, but our love feels like it’s waning.

I’ve been noticing some things and just need to get them off my padding before we settle in for our next push together to grow our business.  We’ve had great run together so far this year baby and I want it to continue.

I feel like I am in one ear and not the other.  And I’m not liking this trend.   A lot of the time I’m just hugging your right ear while the rest of me that should be on your left ear,  is dangling in your split ends.    I guess you do that so you can hear better the conversations of your friends or the Twitter feed or whatever.   But I like hugging you baby.   All of you.   Put me back on both of your ears and I think you’ll do better at your job too.   I can help you focus.

I’ve noticed your wandering eye.   Resist the One Eared ones dear.  Those headsets are trouble.  Oh sure, they dance around looking all sleek and sporty with that single ear “come hither” look.  I’ve seen some too that prance around without cords going brazenly wireless but they are bad news.  Don’t dump me for one of those honey, that just sends the wrong message all around.  You have got to listen and listen real good when talking with folks on the phone; that’s how we’re going to grow the business.  I’ve seen you staring at those One Eared ones though.  And while you can look; you cannot touch. 

You don’t show me a good time so much anymore.   My microphone has hit the monitors at least six times this year and you must remember the two times I got caught in the keyboard your head was so smashed up against the displays.   There used to be a time when talking to folks that you’d spin us around and look out the window or at the plants nearby.  Good times.    Seems you always had better and smarter conversations too when you weren’t obsessing with what’s on that darn desktop.   I want those days back love muffin, I really do.

You don’t smile at me as much lately.  When we first met you smiled and laughed a lot.   Sure, the job is hard but I miss your smile schnookems.  Smile on purpose and keep it fresh.  Heck, I’ve got hair gel, food crumbs and who knows what else encrusted on me ( which reminds me I could use a good cleaning) but everyday I try and make my sounds as fresh and clear as a daisy for you.    You have great smile and a great laugh and it may be the 50th person we’ve talked to today and we’re both tired, but heck,  being happy and positive is why I fell for you in the first place.

I don’t mean to sound all negative.  I don’t.   I feel so connected to you sweetie.  We are a great team.  Let’s buckle in.   The closer we get the stronger we’ll be.  Let’s work hard on keeping the magic alive.

With all my love,

Headset

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

The Bird

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I’m not thinking about the America eagle, or this year’s Thanksgiving turkey or even the late Detroit pitcher Mark Fydrich known as “The Bird” (loved that guy when I was a kid..RIP).

I’m thinking you know, The Bird.

This is a family blog though so I won’t just come out and say it.    Instead I’ll call The Bird a safe acronym like “TB” for the remainder of this post.   And since the acronym “TB” is more commonly known as Tuberculosis (which is a heck of a lot worse than this other TB I’m talking about) by comparison, mine is pretty tame.

What I will say and list for you, are the times during a typical day or a week that I feel I am getting TB (not Tuberculosis type) from businesses.  Not an “in your face” blatant nasty service experience that everyone writes and complains about, but a sudden unpleasant little message you flip in my general direction.  

And that is not good.  Maybe these little affronts are a sign of worse things to come from this experience, this business relationship.  Maybe these little affronts stop the relationship process really before it even starts.

My guess is that businesses may not have a clue they are doing this and if that’s the case, please get a clue.  And if it is being done on purpose, quit it.

The Bell.   If you’re a small business or even a large one and aren’t drooling at the prospect of a prospect walking in your door but instead place a little silver bell for me to ring to get your attention, then you are giving me TB.  Guess I’m not that important.  I suggest a mirror, a dog or some sort of bell on the door I open that gets your attention before I need to.

Flat Screen & Standard Definition TV:   Have a nice bar?  Have a nice place casual dining establishment?  Great, I love it.   But every time you hang that 47” screen over your bar but only show standard definition programming it’s like giving me TB.  If you can’t cough up the costs or work out the deal to broadcast HD don’t insult me with the blurry picture on your beautiful television screen while I sit paying 500% margins on your over priced local brew.  What’s next? Skimping on the soap for the dishwasher?

 “noreply @..”  Ever get one of these emails?  If your business sends out any emails with the sender labeled like this for any reason, you might as well give me TB.  Staff the darn mailbox or forward it to someone who cares because if the recipient is your customer and he or she cares to reply; you should care to listen.

Newspapers Outside The Lines:  This one drives me crazy.  You are giving me TB when you insist dear supermarket, that the newspapers be lined up against that wall at the far end of the store beyond the check out lines.  Now since I just decided upon viewing that I want a newspaper, I must decide to get back in line to pay for one. Nope.   Same goes for the firewood and charcoal and the winter shovels.   What is this losing sales tactic called anyway? “The After Purchase Purchase?”

The 24 Hour Sales Cycle (NOT); Ever get a LinkedIn invite one day and then an invitation to spend money the next?  Ever get a ReTweet on Twitter or a nice comment on your blog post one day and then a pitch from that person or business the next day?  I have.  I’ve gotten them from former colleagues, friends, people and businesses that I know or knew.  Ugh.    Faux Networking is TB in capital letters (I mean like really big capital letters).

TB is fowl.  And while you undoubtedly have your own examples of TB in the marketplace (and please feel free to share),  figuring out if you, your business, your team or your department is doing TB innocently to customers/prospects is important to think about too.   It may be hard to spot or put a finger on so to speak but it’s well worth the look. 

Till next time,

Grow The Business.

Mark

10 Things I Haven’t Mentioned….

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Nice picture.  Screams charasmatic doesn’t it?

Yeah I have to work on that.   But I’ll start with a little more behind the picture today.

I write about what could or should be done in the worlds of sales, marketing and training.   I’m not shy either about having a stand on a few life lessons too.   I’m OK with that. 

So, today here are a few things you won’t read about me in my About pages and that might offer an element of

Well, I have no idea really.

All I do know is that when I read a couple of posts like this one here by blogger Lisa Sonara Beam, who got the idea from Corbett Barr, it helped me. 

Not sure how it helped but it did.   When I read their posts or their tweets now I guess I feel a little more something.  Maybe it was because a little more was laid out there on a limb with the content of the blog.  It was a little more transparent maybe. 

I think too that they feel a little more something when they write having shared stuff that may not have been that easy to share.  Seems like a win- win.

So I’m stealing shamelessly.

1.  My father was a police officer and my mother was a nurse.  He worked days and she worked nights and then she worked days and he worked nights… You get the idea.  Though 4 sons and a daughter, none of us chose either profession as a career.  I feel kind of bad about that.    

2.  Toby W. doesn’t know I love him.  8 years ago he was kind enough to stop me in the hallway and say he knew I was desperately looking for an apartment and that there was one available in the next town over.  7 days and 75 miles later, I moved in, then went to the local church one hot day that summer, saw the love of my new life cantering, married her 7 years later and am still the Luckiest Man in The World.   Toby visits the office every once in a while (he’s a field sales guy), but he has no idea why I stare at him so long, often saying nothing.  He knows now.  I love you man.

3.  I was always afraid of dogs.  Till I got one.  Now I am just a little afraid.

4.  I went to college as an Engineering Major.  Oh yeah, a 5 year program with the last 2 years supposed to be at Notre Dame.   But in my sophomore year at Stonehill College when I started digging into the trash bins in the computer lab looking for hints of how to just start my computer programming assignments,  I realized this ain’t for me and changed majors right quick.

5.  For nearly 5 years I drove 4 hours a day commuting to and from work.  75 miles each way in some of the worst traffic imaginable.  Longest round trip? 9 hours.  You do what you need to do for your family, you discover books on tape and learn first hand that you never travel in the far left lane; ever,  it’s always the slowest.  Stay in the middle lane my friend.  Always.

6.  Writing is the Great Clarifier.  Writing adds more depth to my thinking, strategizing and execution without a doubt.  It’s not something I do in addition to my job.  It is something I do to get the job done.  Hard to explain, but true.

7.  It’s the little things that drive me crazy.  I’ll use cuss words that would make Capt. Quint wince (he’s from the movie Jaws for you youngin’s) when that razor falls out of the cabinet again or I am stuck having to open up a cereal package (impossible).  If I lost an arm in a power saw accident however, I assure you that you wouldn’t hear a peep out of me.  Seen it before; big stuff happens and I’m cool as a cucumber, little stuff happens and the good Sisters at St. Catherine’s would ditch the ruler and grab a 2 by 4.

8.  A 30 pack of Bud Light saved my life.  Between his second and third murder over the span of 5 days, this guy  walked up to my car window while I tried to pull out into traffic in Meredith, NH in 2001.  He leaned into my car window and asked “can I get a lift to the print shop just down the road?”.  His hand heavily resting on the door frame and his head now nearly touching mine, I just glanced at the 30 pack of Bud Light on the passenger seat, shrugged and said “Hey man, no room”.   I  then hit the accelerator harder than I planned and drove off; something just wasn’t right about him.  2 of the 3 guys he killed I found out later, had given him a lift just like I almost did.    Maybe this is why I still love beer so much.

9.  I love my Mom’s music .  On my IPod, I’ve got everything from Jock Jams to Broadway musicals to Mozart’s Requiem to Police (Live!) to John Denver to a dozen full length Biz books.  So what.  Everybody has a wild mix of music.  My favorite Playlist is the one I made for my Mom 2 years ago.  She’s 77.   I burned 2 CD’s for her of her favorite stuff ranging from Church hymns to Paul Simon to Les Miserables and I know I listen to it more than she does.

10. I know nothing about cars, babies, electronics, weapons, meat that is anything but well done, astrology, soccer, tennis and fishing.  Conversely, I know way too much about backyard sports (including dozens of made up games), football, books of lists, scrabble and cemeteries.  So there you go; that about evens it up.

Till next time,

Grow the business.

Mark

Mullet Over

Standard

mark mullet years

Sales and Dating just don’t mix.  But when they do, there are lessons to be learned.

Tonight you are super sales guy Rock Ledger.  You are single and in a bar.  Good Times.

And lucky you, it’s also 80’s night.  This feels good.  This was your time.  This was where the Rock Ledger legend began.  So even though you are not much of a dancer, it’s flashback (and Flashdance) fever tonight so you have got it going on!

You Rock Ledger, you super sales man, you  did your pre – party research, and prepared well for this 80’s night.   And holy leg warmers, you spy someone you think you’d like to talk to.  You remember her name is Tiffany.

Excellent.   Time to make your move.

A bit sweaty now because you just had to break out some moves to the blaring tune Safety Dance, you are comforted knowing that the rusty Aquanet hairspray you found buried in your dresser drawer (literally from the 80’s you suspect), had enough juice to keep hair  securely shaped into that “oh so cool” Mullet.  You amble over to Tiffany in your now ill – fitting Members Only jacket and say:

“Well Hello there.” 

“Well Hello to you.”  She says.  She looks at you coyly.  She’s curious.  You look back.   An awkward pause ensues, but you are ready.  Conversation is your game.

“I was wondering” you say, (knowing full well how good your John Stamos Full House Mullet looks)….  “Are you happy with growth of your family or are you just looking to keep the family you have?”

 “Whaaaat?” She cries.

 “No, I ‘m sorry.  What I meant was, how happy are you recently with things?  Is life going well for you?  Are you really happy with your current boyfriend or do you want to be happier?”

“Listen Skippy, I barely know you..”, she says. (And of course you’re thinking that “Skippy” was Michael J Fox’s dorky friend on Family Ties and you definitely do not, look like Skippy)

“Ok I’m really sorry this is not starting off well.  All I want to know is why can’t I have a serious conversation with you?”

WHAP!! Your face, ego and hair sprayed Mullet all get whacked at once.  Face and ego bruised, the Mullet surrenders too and snaps back from whence it came.  Your 80’s night is now over.

**

Mildly entertaining?  Sure.   But Rock Ledger’s conversation with Tiffany is not that much different than some of the early conversations we have with our business customers and prospects.  Though we are well intentioned, many of us launch into some very deep questions right off the get go.

We are quick to ask these deep and frankly quite “personal” (especially when speaking with small to med size businesses) questions that while your customer won’t likely literally “slap” you like Tiffany did, they sure as hell might want to.

Think about what many of us ask after a few moments of introduction or in our first meeting.

  • “Are you focused on growth or maintaining your customer base?
  •  “How is the economy treating you, are you guys doing OK?”
  •  “Are you happy with your current supplier?
  •  “What’s the biggest challenge you are facing this year?
  •   “I want to understand your needs better, so I have some  questions..”

Should we be asking these questions of our customers?  Yes we should.  But should we take some time to buy the prospect a metaphorical drink or two and build a little trust and value about ourselves or our company first?  Prove we care about really helping the prospect first?   You bet.  Tiffany would have appreciated it.

This doesn’t have to take too long.  It can take as little as a first date but more often than not (especially today in this low trust competitive environment), you shouldn’t ask these types of “personal questions” till you’ve had a few dates or you might get whapped.  It’s tough, the pressure is on.  You need to perform.  Rock Ledger wants to close the deals right quick too, but you saw what happened to him.

You can dance if you want to.   And I suggest you do.  But dance the long dance version please first.

Till next time,

Grow the Business.

Mark